GREETINGS POTENTIAL BUYERS! I am here to introduce you to the brilliant new series, CHRONO MECHANICS. You may have already noticed that time is a fickle mistress. It can fly, crawl or even stand still. What you don’t realize is that these are symptoms of Quantum Malfunctions. I will enlighten you. Time is a big machine; one that needs the constant attention of a special breed of repairmen called CHRONO MECHANICS. These Mechanics are exceptional individuals, handpicked from throughout history because of their diverse skills and attributes. Team 9.2 of Sector 7 is comprised of individuals like Oot (caveman), Caravaggio (inventor), Zyn (child of the Gem) and Dough (rock god). Of course, their methods are a bit, uh, unorthodox, but they never fail to get the job done. Don’t forget to look for me, the Quantum Elucidator! Sure, the Mechanics may have flashy suits, cool vehicles, high-tech gadgets, and Rocket Boots instead of special orthopedic shoes, and teammates who don’t call you ‘Wheezy,’ or say you smell like cheese, or give you the wrong directions to parties on purpose...*sniff* At least Mamala loves me for who I am. I-I mean, check out those reviews!